When you are trapped by any situation, you are programmed to become angry to improve your odds of escaping. This is especially true if you are in the Abyss of chronic pain. Read the post Your Hand Stuck Over the Stove.
There are several concepts to consider regarding the interaction between pain, anxiety and anger:
- When a basic need such as air, food, or water is not met, anxiety ensues. When you lose control of your ability to resolve the problem you will become angry.
- Anger causes you to increase your efforts—often dramatically
- Not being in pain is a basic human need
- Anger and Anxiety-“The Highway to Hell”
Anxiety represents a feeling of vulnerability and helplessness. We are programmed to avoid anxiety at all costs. Anger causes you to feel powerful, which covers up the feeling of anxiety. Yet at the same time anger causes your mind to race faster and reinforce your anxiety-producing circuits. It is the turbocharger that must be turned off.
The Genealogy of Anger:
- Anxiety-producing circumstance over which you have lost control— you feel trapped Video: Completely Trapped
- You then blame yourself or the situation
- You are now in a victim role
- Frustration, anger, or even rage is the final result
Anger is an anxiety-driven survival reaction.
The circumstance may be perceived or real:
- Examples of perceived victimhood are: a) being cut off in traffic b) not being invited to a party c) not enough time to do what you would like
- Examples of real anger are: a) being physically assaulted and robbed b) vicious gossip c) wrongfully imprisoned
Real verus Perceived Victimhood
The similarity between real and perceived victimhood is that the final result is anger and it will destroy you either way. The difference between real and perceived anger is that real anger is much more difficult to let go.
The Effect of Anger on Your Family
Finally understand the devastating effects of chronic pain and anger on your immediate family. You would do anything for them and you also need their support. Why would you continue to allow pain to rule your life? Pain = Anger = Abuse