Overview
- Repetitive Unwanted Thoughts (RUTs) are a source of much misery.
- The harder you fight them, the stronger they become.
- Learn four aspects of solving them, and go on to thrive.
- RUTs are solvable by allowing your body to heal.
I did not quit practicing spine surgery to manage chronic pain. I witnessed hundreds of patients not only resolve multiple symptoms but step into a life they had never believed was possible. They learned to thrive. I am one of those people.
My story
My new book, Calm Your Body, Heal Your Mind: Transcend Pain, Anxiety, Anger, and Repetitive Unwanted Thoughts, is the culmination of a 35-year journey that began with a panic attack on the 520 bridge in Seattle, WA. I did not become a major spine surgeon because of anxiety, and I was a master at suppressing it, which turned out to be at the core of the problem. I had no idea what had hit me or why it happened, and no one had any answers. I steadily sank into a deep hole I call “The Abyss,” with 17 physical and mental symptoms and not a shred of hope. The mental pain progressed to include unrelenting, repetitive, intrusive thoughts, and, along with feeling socially isolated, I almost committed suicide. The unwanted thoughts and isolation were the worst part of my ordeal.
By 2004, all my symptoms had resolved. I had tried every possible intervention, making more mistakes than successes. As healing concepts emerged, I was able to share them with my patients. I still did not understand why, so I kept digging.
Digging deeper
In 2009, I realized a major issue in medicine was that patients did not feel heard and were labeled. I knew that addressing anger was central to healing, and that feeling trapped was problematic. Howard Schubiner, a renowned pain physician, researcher, and author, was the keynote speaker at a 2009 conference I held, “A Course of Compassion, Empathy in the Presence of Chronic Pain.” He clearly delineated the Mind Body Syndrome, and the pieces began to fit together.
In 2013, Dr. Fred Luskin’s book, Forgive for Good, entered my practice, marking the era when patients began to heal consistently. Dealing with anger is the tipping point of healing. In 2020, I met Dr. Stephen Porges, a renowned researcher and founder of the Polyvagal theory. We formed an informal multidisciplinary scientific study group, and it became clear that chronic symptoms, illness, and disease arise from sustained fight-or-flight chemistry. Other terms for this are threat or stress physiology. The whole body, including the brain, is fired up, with increased fuel consumption, inflammation, faster nerve conduction, excitatory neurotransmitter activity, and resources diverted to the musculoskeletal system and away from other organs. It is like driving your car down the freeway in a low gear. It will break down quickly.
I witnessed hundreds of patients heal by learning to implement strategies that calm the body and reroute the nervous system. It required minimal resources, posed no risk, and demanded persistence. Like mastering any skill, repetition is necessary. Improvements occur over 3-6 months, and the timing of deep healing is unpredictable.
Deep healing
What do I mean by deep healing? When healing occurred, the response was like mine. Almost all, if not all, the symptoms resolved. The length and intensity of their suffering did not matter, nor did the number of procedures. However, one factor kept recurring: the misery caused by repetitive unwanted thoughts (RUTs). Pain would improve or resolve, and anxiety and depression would lift, but these thoughts would keep rattling around. Something was missing. Many members of the scientific group provided answers, and most of the concepts in my book emanate from this group.
I was surprised to learn that anxiety and anger are survival reactions and physiological states. They are not disorders but alarm signals. They are far more powerful than your conscious brain. In fact, when you sense danger, real or perceived, your body has already reacted, and thoughts follow one to ten seconds later. It is the physiology first, and since we are constantly on the lookout for danger, there are many unpleasant thoughts.
Our reaction is to fight or suppress them, which embeds them in our brain, and we become our thoughts. They then become a source of threat – and we really cannot escape our thoughts. It is like having your hand stuck over a hot stove, and you’ll do anything to escape or cope. Behaviors include substance abuse, addictions, repetitive actions, eating disorders, and cutting, and you’ll experience mental health issues as these strategies eventually fail.
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Unless you calm the threat physiology driving RUTs, you cannot resolve them. Once you understand the nature of the problem, viable solutions exist. Here is one story.
His background
I just received this unexpected email from someone I met online about a year and a half ago, from Europe. He is in his early 20’s.
He had been experiencing extreme levels of intense intrusive thoughts for many years and was almost housebound. He had tried almost everything and was desperate. I talked to him a couple of times, which were extremely circular conversations. He elected to stick with what he was doing, and I had no sense that he would do well.
I sent him the PDF of my new book. About 6 weeks later, he let me know he had read my book and was proceeding through The DOC Journey course. I did not hear much for a few months, and then he started reaching out via text. We had maybe four conversations over the last year. About 4 months ago, he began to separate from his RUTs and move forward. I talked to him earlier this week, as he had a setback. However, his mother had just passed away, and he was being drafted into the military. We reviewed the link between stress and RUTs, and he was able to give himself a break and get back on track.
I was surprised and encouraged that he could find relief with minimal outside input. Healing, by definition, must be self-directed. Calm Your Body, Heal Your Mind provided the framework, and he learned the skills through my course. Persistence was the key. I was excited to see that someone with the severity of intrusive thoughts could heal. He is not yet where he would like to be, but he is well on his way. My consistent observation is that when people reach this tipping point, they continue to move forward.
His Letter
Good evening, doctor,
I hope you are doing well. I wanted to send you this email regardless of my health situation. I simply wanted to say a huge thank you for everything you have done for me.
You have truly changed my life in so many ways. The reason I felt the need to write this today is that I was talking with my father earlier. He is 74 years old, and a few months ago, we lost my mother, his wife, so he has been going through a very difficult time. We speak every day, and I often share many of the things I have learned from you with him.
Today, he shared some of his thoughts with me, and I realized how much he has changed for the better as well, thanks to all your help and guidance. This is a man who never even finished school, yet the knowledge and perspective you have given me — which I then shared with him through our conversations — have genuinely transformed him as a person.
So, this thank-you is not only from me but from my whole family. You have helped us more than you can imagine, and honestly, I now feel like you are part of our family.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything. I truly wish you health, happiness, and all the best always.
Many practitioners have experienced similar successes with patients, and the exact approach is not important. The common theme is that patients trust their practitioner and feel safe. The body breaks down under chronic threat, and it knows how to heal when it feels safe. Each story like this, including mine, is why I, and many of my colleagues, keep pushing forward.
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