Choose Not to Be a Victim
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Once you have a clear idea of the depth of your anger and your role of being a victim, make a simple decision to not be a victim anymore. Write down, “I choose not to be a victim.”  Date it and put it in a place you will see it … Read More

Admit Your Victimhood
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IDENTIFY YOUR OWN VICTIM ROLE—IT IS UNIVERSAL What person or circumstance is upsetting me?  Be specific. Acknowledge that you are blaming that person or situation for making you angry. Write or speak out loud to yourself, “I blame ___________ for making me upset. Understand that you are now in the role of a victim. Write or speak that I … Read More

Perfectionism—The Ultimate Victim Role
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Perfectionism is an additional—and perhaps less examined— way that people play the victim. Many view perfection as the standard that must be reached in order to be successful. It’s held up as a virtue in all aspects of our lives, especially in professional and vocational endeavors. We feel pressure from … Read More

My Victimhood
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I was raised in an abusive household and living that life seemed normal because it was all that I knew. I was truly a victim, but I didn’t know it at the time. It was only through extensive counseling that I realized I was continuing to play that role. It is … Read More

Advantages of Victimhood–No one Believes You
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Without an obvious source of pain, patients eventually feel that no one believes that they have pain. It is an endless source of frustration and you are a legitimate victim. But, inadvertently, you are placed in a powerful victim role. The Cry of Chronic Pain Not only did I believe … Read More

Anger/Victim with Worker’s Comp
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There is a “genealogy” of frustration/anger. It is: Circumstance Blame Victim Frustration/Anger There are two types of “victimhood”: Perceived                                                               … Read More

Awareness–Ingrained Patterns
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  Awareness is the essence of healing in that you cannot stimulate your brain to develop in a given direction, unless you know where you are starting from. Awareness is both a tool and foundation for moving forward with your life. There are four patterns of awareness that work for … Read More

Forgiveness as a Habit
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Once is not enough in forgiveness Perhaps this game is like weeding. The trick is to become so practiced that you can sing while you do it, that when you see one beginning to sprout you will by instinct lay your fingers in the earth, find its root, and set … Read More

Is your Recreation “Wreck Creation?” 
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There is a basic dividing line in life that influences the development of your brain. Is your overall life outlook based on love or fear? For many of us that were raised in a less than nurturing environment, being afraid is the norm and dictates the way we respond to a … Read More

27 Surgeries–”I elected to not be in pain”
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For many years, I thought that for many patients there was a point of no return because the sheer magnitude of both physical and emotional trauma. I particularly felt this way with people who had undergone many failed surgeries. I was wrong and continue to hear stories of healing in … Read More

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